3.28.2006

so i'm here.

i'm in LA.
its kinda dreary today.
it fits my mood.

yesterday was one of the hardest days of my life. leaving mckinna at the airport, getting in my car and driving away alone. alone. i hate it. my heart aches.

i'm around great people, though. nathan, jill, johnny, malia, jordan. they're really good people.

when we got here on thursday night, it was really late after a 15 hour day in the car that included the grand canyon. and the canyon was indeed grand.

friday was fun. unpacked a bit, got on my bike a bit, had great sushi at this placed called kabuki. so stinkin' good. always get an eel avocado roll if possible. wherever you get sushi, get an eel avocado roll. friday night was dinner at the dawsons, the place that i will be living for the next 2 months. great chicken, great wine. nathan can freakin' cook. . . he knows food.

saturday was good too, went down to santa monica and the pier. there was the this amazing art exhibit. if you come out here before may 14th, i'm taking you there because you must see it. then we chilled on the pier, rode the rollercoaster and then ate at this place called cafe crepe on the promenade. great times. great food again.

then we headed down to venice beach. did some cool things there, and if you ask me about it, i'll tell you.

sunday was sunday. church, food, relax, church, desperate housewives. seriously, it was good stuff. after the show was over, nathan, jill, johnny and malia prayed over mckinna and i. it was encouraging.

monday was breakfast and off to the airport. and that brings us to today. in LA. still feeling kind of alone, but i know i'm supposed to be here. i miss her. i love her.

be good to each other. look at Christ. peace.

3.06.2006

leaving



i'm leaving in two weeks. exactly two weeks. to beautiful socal.
i feel so unprepared, so unready, so . . . scared.
i can't even wrap my brain around what it looks to live so far away from here.
i have such mixture of emotions right now.
sad, excited, anxious, nervous, frustrated even.
i can't wait to start working in an environment where i get to do what i love to do.
but its so hard leaving the one i love.
how will i fit in? will my ideas be automatically challenged because i'm the "new guy?"
why can't she just move out there with me? (i know the answer, but it doesn't make it easy)
i just want to curl up and cry, then run around shouting because i get to get out of indiana . . .
i don't know what to feel. . .
and that may be the most frustrating part of it all.
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